Desi Aunty Fucking Not Uncle

I saw the dynamic duo enter and head for my table; the place was pretty much empty."Hi daddy," said Jill."Hi dad," said Jimmy."Back atcha, both of you," I said. "You guys look good. School agrees with you." I was so proud of the two of them: tall good looking kids. Did I say I was a proud daddy."Daaddeee," said Jill, "I've seen that look before. You're up to something." Jimmy nodded agreement."Nothing too earth shattering kids, just a surprise for your mother. Are you up for it?' I said.The yeah-yeahs were enthusiastic. I hated doing what I was about to do, but this one was for me. I was not going to end up the bad guy in this, and that was a dead-mortal-lead-pipe-cincheroonie. I told them that their mother and I were to meet up at the lodge where we had conceived them many years ago and have a fun weekend. I told them that I wanted them to be a part of it, but that their mother was in the dark about my plans. They yea-ed the heck out of the idea; the yeas would soon be turning to. "Thanks, Joan. But there's more to it, I think, isn't there?"Now the younger girl reddened, "Yes, ma'am. You look like you ... like you just got out of bed with a man. I have never seen a girl look so ... so sleek. And you move like a cat. Anyway, I'm impressed. Whatever it is you've found, you can make a mint if you can bottle it!" Ginger, where did you find a girl with such intelligence, taste, good judgment and brains? Of course, she is laying it on a little thick, even to an ex-actress."She smiled at Joan and said, "There's just one thing: the name is Ali, at least when there aren't any clients around. Particularly when I'm dressed like an urchin off the streets. Incidentally, Judy, thank you again for the very professional reception. If I had been sitting in your seat, I probably would have thrown me out. But in LA, particularly, you can't judge people by their dress." Then she said, "Ging, I was thinking when I walked in about your professional name. The name on the door is.
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