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Well, I hope you are Hunky Dory after you read this and chuckle.About a month ago, I illuminated some old expressions that have become obsolete because of the inexorable march of technology. These phrases included “Don’t touch that dial,” “Carbon copy,” “You sound like a broken record” and “Hung out to dry.”Back in the olden days we had a lot of moxie. We’d put on our best bib and tucker to straighten up and fly right.Heavens to Betsy!Gee whillikers!Jumping Jehoshaphat!Holy moley!We were in like Flynn and living the life of Riley, and even a regular guy couldn’t accuse us of being a knucklehead, a nincompoop or a pill. Not for all the tea in China!Back in the olden days, life used to be swell, but when’s the last time anything was swell?Swell has gone the way of beehives, pageboys and the D.A.; of spats, knickers, fedoras, poodle skirts, saddle shoes and pedal pushers.Oh, my aching back. Kilroy was here, but he isn’t anymore.We wake up from what surely has been just a short nap, and. The last step was to push a broom handle in about 5′, crushing the meat of the melon as the juice drained out into the sink, I then rinsed and dried it, and carried it to and placed it on the towels on my bed! By now, it was coming up on 9:00 o’clock, it was dark, the house was locked and dark, and I closed and locked my bedroom door, turned to my bed and, with my heart in my throat, started to undress, going over my plan once more: for the first one, I was going to see just how long I could jerk myself — how many of the smaller, ‘dry’ orgasms I could enjoy — before cumming! On other occasions, when my wife and kids were gone shopping for a couple of hours, I’d been able to go for about 45 minutes, with a dozen or so of those breath-taking pleasures, but now, with the whole night spread before like a sumptuous sex-feast, my goal was to hold it back for an hour or more, with at least twenty mini-orgasms, stopping only long enough between pleasure-peaks to let that sense of urgency.
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