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I apologised for over reacting and Michelle gently scolded me for saying sorry. I smiled at her and continued after a moment of reflection. “No matter what I do, no matter what I say, I ultimately feel inferior…of little worth.” I swallowed hard again and looked at the floor. I could feel the swell of the emotional tide brimming right behind my eyes. Michelle’s words had sunk in; they made sense, but the hurt would not go away. Michelle was offering me a chance to talk about these deep feelings and as I had started on this path of divulgence, I did not want to deviate or waste the opportunity. “Your self-esteem has taken a battering. Still is by the sound of it?” Michelle suggested. I could not look at her but nodded in agreement. I could sense Michelle understood just how close to the mark she was on that point. “I feel as though I live under constant scrutiny; like I’m constantly being appraised and measured against her male work colleagues and in her assessment, albeit based on. "I suppose that means a sweater and tie," I said as we were saying goodnight at the door.Kelley was watching me put my boots on. "No, it means casual. Wear anything you like."Our goodnight kiss was tentative, changing to intense until she pulled away, breathless and smiling. I left without prolonging our farewell, already looking forward to having dinner with the Harveys the following night.Heavy snow was accumulating on the roads and I was glad to make it home and get into bed because it had been a long, tiring day. The first thing I did when I got up the next morning was to look out the window and find that it had stopped snowing.After breakfast I called Marcie. Her mother said she hadn't arrived home from school yet. Her flight had been delayed, but she would have Marcie call me the minute she came in.Next, I phoned the Baldwin home and when Mr. Baldwin said none of the daughters had arrived yet I decided to call my mom to see if the package got there. Heather answered the.
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