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“First, I think it’s important to address the suicidal thoughts you’ve been having.”“I hadn’t even realized I’d been feeling like that until she got me to talk about it. It was a complete surprise to me. Last night I thought about it a lot after we went to bed. I have too much to live for to kill myself. I think I’ve latched onto it as a way of easing the pain, getting peace from everything that’s happened and push the problems away. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to harm myself, but I suppose it’s like a fat person looking at a buffet when they’re on a diet, trying to get themselves in shape. They know that it would be an emotional payoff, but the drawbacks afterwards just aren’t worth it, as much as they think it will make them feel good.”“That makes some sense, Matt. Now why don’t the two of you tell me what happened yesterday and we’ll go from there. I may have to split you up so that we can work with a little bit of privacy.”“Don’t split us up for my session,” I told her.. Good for you." Thanks, Maggie," Amanda beamed."Ditto. You're all right in my book." I said. Her friends came over, and they were all remarking on how brave we were. Amanda looked at them, and said, "You know what? I don't feel brave. I feel free."That was a good way to put it.Maggie and her friends found a table, and we were alone again. They called our number, and I went up to get the food. Of course, Maggie noticed this, and had to let out a wolf-whistle.We ate, and the rest of the meal was fairly uneventful. Oh, sure, we got stared at, and I know at least one couple of old fogies took one look at us in the altogether and stormed out in a huff, but it was all right. More than all right, considering the company. We chatted about anything and everything, getting to know one another better. She told me a bit more about being guarded. I told her a bit more about being shy. And we both agreed that we pulled each other out of all that. Well, each other, and The Program. Then we chatted.
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