But when I’m sitting in my apartment at night hunkered down in dim light before my computer screen, I can’t hide from the reality of my loneliness. At least for a while I had companions in my loneliness, but now Eric was getting married. Now I was even alone in my aloneness. I kept striding an brooding until I suddenly realized the gym was nearly empty. I glanced at the wall clock: 1:30. Yipes! I’d been on the machine for an hour. I quickly rushed to the showers, dreading the baneful scolding awaiting me from my Blackberry as it was overwhelmed with messages for me. Oh well…it wasn’t like I wasn’t going to work until seven or eight o’clock anyway… —————— I went home that night and resolved that I would try, again, to go out socially and meet people, any maybe give someone a chance to show me she saw more than dollar bills when she looked in my eyes. That was my honest intention. I had no way of knowing that on before the week was out Wall Street would plummet, losing ten percent of. The meal over the chatting restarted. “So why haven’t you found a man?” Amy asked. “Well” I replied “it isn’t as if I haven’t been looking. I am 28 honey and perhaps I am running out of time”. The smile returned and I had a feeling that things were not ok with her and hubby Stan.She ordered a second bottle and seemed to be getting a little tipsy. “You asked about Stan” she began “well we are still married but the spark is dead. I am lucky if we have sex once a week”. I knew Stan and he seemed so nice. “But you still look so happy” I said, trying to steer her away for her love life. Frankly I didn’t need to know the intimate details of their love life, or lack thereof. She leaned across the table and whispered “but I have found an alternative”. Now I only knew one alternative. It was 7” long and vibrated. Perhaps she had one too. “Oh” I said “a toy?” I asked. “Better than a toy darling. Anonymous sex”. I didn’t quite understand. How could sex be anonymous? She saw the look on my face..
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