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Even when I am in Evan mode, I catch myself using my well-practicedhigher octave feminine voice and my hand and arm movements are equallyfeminine.My European co-workers must believe I am gay. I believe I amtransgendered. My dressing went past crossdressing a long time ago.Following taking some deep breathes, which is hindered by my waistcincher, I ask my wife if I should bother coming home. I have visionsof her posting my pictures all over the internet. Peggy tells me, "Yes,come home. I am surprisingly not that angry, more hurt that you did notshare Emma with me. It is clear she is a big part of you. You have puta lot of time and effort, if not study into being Emma. I could besitting in a waiting room with you, dressed as Emma, and I do not thinkI would recognize you as anyone else, other than an attractive, prettywoman. I might actually be jealous."I apologize for not being open, over and over. She tells me not to beatmyself up. She has questions and we can talk about them when I. He watches me bring him closer to rest his head against my belly. Almost immediately, he wraps his arms around me, embracing me tightly and begins to weep. I don’t complain; he needs to understand that I am here for him. "If I had known, I would have been by your side. I am here for you, you do know that, right?” I quietly ask, trying to give him the comfort that he needs. “I know that now. God, I’m so sorry, Beth," he murmurs against my robe. “Sssh, it’s okay. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too,” I softly say, running my hands into his hair. “No, I should have been honest with you but…it was awful, I didn’t know what to do,” he whispers, looking up to see my face. My heart breaks at the distress in his eyes. “Why don’t I call for some food and we can talk about it?” I gently smile, lightly brushing my thumb over his cheekbones to sweep his tears off his smooth skin. Nodding, he releases me and I reach for the phone. ********************* We talk for hours over pizza and soda. He.
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