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I wanted so much for everything to get back to where they were, and that's impossible."Allan, darling, I've just been very upset. Then this weekend I knew we couldn't be together, and I was upset and angry, not at you, at the situation. It came out wrong, and I distanced myself from you. I'm sorry. I'd give anything for you to come back to me and you can't."She began to cry."Ann," I spoke softly, "it's not that I don't want to try to get back. It's that at present there are too many unsaid things; too many mysteries in my mind."I'm with someone else who needs me. You won't see that but she does need me. I will not let her down. I can't sort out my feelings for you. Everyone is pushing me to just go back to the way we were. I can't. It's not that I won't, it's that I can't. I've so little memory to go back to. You understand?"She nodded, looking woebegone.I continued, "Give it time. I don't want to go through all my worries and feelings now, but I am willing to meet you and to talk. I considered buying a new PS4 game to take my mind off things. I ended up following my nose into the large department store in town that I regularly visit. The had a large hosiery department with all of the expensive quality brands that I loved and had enjoyed trying on over the years since I'd been earning enough for the odd treat. I just couldn't help myself. I looked through the first couple of rows and was considering a purchase or two to treat myself when I noticed two young women at the tills making a purchase. As they paid for their items they turned and faced me. One of them was Helen! We made eye contact, she gave me a faint smile as I felt my cheeks flush bright red, then continuing her conversation with her friend, she left the store. I was back in panic mode. After everything, she's now seen me standing in a hosiery department! Idiot! I returned home and the rest of the weekend dragged with me still not really knowing what to do. Sunday evening came and whilst lying in.
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