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Beth and her parents had already gone back home.“A couple of days after that we flew back home.“I told Mom I couldn’t see you, talk to you or tell you what happened. Mom got even more upset with me, but when I told her that unless she agreed to not let you see or talk to me, then I would try to kill myself again.“Then a couple of weeks later I had a miscarriage.“The rest you know. I moved in with Mom’s younger sister for my senior year.“Do you hate me now, Sam? I would understand ... really, I would understand if you hated me now.”“Debs,” I started, using my pet name for her, “I can’t even tell you how much it hurt when I realized you did not want to see me or talk to me after you came back.“I figured you must have fallen in love with someone else.“Then when I found out that you had been pregnant, and had a miscarriage, I told myself how much I DID hate you.“For three years, I have hated you, and wanted to call you every name in the book. I had practiced exactly what I would tell you. Janice told me the potion took 10 to 15 minutes to take affect. She again warned me that there was no turning back. I would have to have sex, no matter what. So regardless how Ron looked or whatever he said, it would not deter me. Once ingested, my fate was sealed.Fidgeting, checking on the defrosted steaks yet one more time, straightening the candles again, I kept glancing at the clock. For me, to be dressed like I was in the bedroom would be embarrassing, but to be downstairs in the more public parts of the house almost caused me several times to run upstairs and change."Where is he?" I muttered again and again, tapping my toe while sitting, or wringing my hands when pacing.I kept finding myself back in the kitchen, staring at the little bottle on the counter next to the canister containing flour. What will it feel like? I kept thinking. What if it doesn't work? Janice said it always works, but what if it doesn't on me? Will I be able to go through with this without the potion?My.
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