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" And he did it only to be mean, I should think. What a fucking bastard!A cavalier thought came to me at that moment, "I could undo the damage mom?"She frowned slightly, "What do you mean Darren?" I could order you to forget all your bad memories and I could even order you to like sex again."She stood suddenly, taking her barely touched plate to the counter. "Not all the memories were bad Darren."And the order to like sex again? After a few moments of awkward silence I apologized, "I'm sorry mom - I never intended to say that phrase."She just stole an odd look at me before starting to make a plate of food for dad for when he got home late tonight.With her back facing me, it gave me the chance to notice how my middle aged mother looked. Here was a woman that had lived a life that I had not even considered, one that was done involuntarily by her own father. He was a bastard to do this to his own daughter. In that picture she looked so young, so tiny, so innocent. Now, she was a rather. Less fortunate for me arethe growing number of evenings when I have failed to meet her requirements andshe leaves me waiting after in the exceedingly cramped corner of her masterbedroom closet. The only things I usually have to keep me mentally occupied inthe dark are the many nervous butterflies in my stomach and the thin lessnoticeable welts that she leaves with a wire clothes hanger. There are other moreterrifying nights when she returns and is dressed in things just a little lesscasual (A half T-shirt with a pair of old jeans cut-off very short at thecrouch, halter tops which match her girlishly tight gym pants, or just aclinging low cut summer dress which is never anything less then totallyrevealing). These risqu? andcomfortably sexy outfits of hers have become very unsettling, as I am oftentaken to the basement on these occasions, (that is whenever she has a good mindto) and hung up by my wrists for the beginning of a very unpleasant night underthe mercy of her many whips..
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