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A mortician was laying out the body of a man with an unbelievably long penis. He called in his receptionist to show her.She took one look and said, “Big deal. That’s just like my husband’s penis.”“You mean he’s got one that long?” asked the surprised mortician.“No,” she replied. “That dead.”I know you have been laying awake at night wondering why baby diapers have brand names such as “Luvs”, “Huggies,” and “Pampers’, while undergarments for old people are called “Depends”.Well here is the low down on the whole thing... When babies crap in their pants, people are still gonna Luv’em, Hug’em and Pamper’ em. When old people crap in their pants, it “Depends” on who’s in the will!Glad I got that straightened out so you can rest your mind.The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries, and a drink.He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife.He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and. I finally had to ask, "What about the kids?" and she responded, "We'll just be quiet. They won't come downstairs. I'm usually down here all evening and never hear/see them."I didn't want this to end. So I simply nodded, gasped as she ground her hips into me harder, and kept pushing upwards.Brandy finally climbed off me. I just laid there on the couch and said nothing. I was completely shocked and utterly stunned when, without a word, she reached down, unbuckled my belt, unhooked it, pulled it back, and unbuttoned my pants.I looked up at her. She just stared at me and finally said, "What? Cat got your tongue again? This is a new thing for me. I'm not used to you not mouthing off or saying something sarcastic and smart-ass."I just laid there, so Brandy continued on. And as she got my pants unzipped, she just stopped without a sound. She stood there, looking down, staring at my underwear.I looked at her, as she glanced at me, and I finally said, "What?"She didn't say anything for a.
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