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—– Michael: Please try to understand my situation, I was dying and I could be saved with a new liver. I had a high opinion of myself in those days and I reasoned that my death would result in a huge number of lives being lost as well, lives that I could have saved had I been saved. The vegetive patients I reasoned, would be a good source of organs and if I could find one that was a decent match for me then I could help nature take its course. I began a clandestine survey of the patients, looking for one that could give me a new lease of life. I had no luck in my own hospital but I was reasonably well known at the surrounding ones so I widened my search. In the end I found a young woman who lay paralysed after a traffic accident, she even had a donor card. I checked her health carefully and was delighted to find that she was in excellent health apart from being pregnant, a fact that was surprisingly missing from her chart. —– Sally: When I awoke I could see and hear but I couldn’t. Mark MacDonald, San Francisco2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient’s anterior chest wall...‘Big breaths, ‘ ... I instructed.‘Yes, they used to be, ‘ ... Replied the patient.Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct.Not more than five minutes later, I heard herReporting to the rest of the family that he hadDied of a ‘massive internal fart.’Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg4. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ‘How long have you been bedridden?’After a look of complete confusion she answered...‘ Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.’Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR5. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB.I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams ... To cover my embarrassmentI had unconsciously formed a habit of.
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