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’ I froze, and then quickly stood up. ‘Don’t!’ I moved even further away before I turned to look at him. ‘I don’t want your pity. I don’t need you to feel sorry for me.’ He spread his hands. ‘I don’t. I happen to love you.’ ‘This is nuts.’ I shook my head. ‘You don’t love me. Ok, maybe you do. But as a friend, a sister, a . . . a companion.’ I started pacing back and forth. ‘You know everything about me. We’re comfortable with each other like a pair of old shoes.’ I sighed. ‘I need more. I need it all. I need to be swept off my feet! I need to be romanced and I’ve never had that! I want to be desired and fawned over . . I want to be told I’m beautiful.’ I stopped pacing and tried not to cry. ‘I want to be loved so badly it hurts. It hurts a lot. But I can’t let myself believe that just because you’re having some kind of mid- life crisis or worse. . . feeling lonely, suddenly you love me.’ I was starting to get angry now. ‘I’m just supposed to fall into your arms in gratitude because. Anyhow, my apologies." Please don't apologize; I was happy to do it. Can you tell me what happened with Willie, or would you rather wait until the morning brain fog clears?"He took a sip of his coffee. "Somehow, I think you already have a pretty good idea what happened. I tried to sit down and talk to her about the gap between her aspirations to a life of wedded bliss, and the reality of living with a damaged soul like me. It got ugly in a hurry." How so?" Well, she accused me of sponging off of her and using her for my own sexual gratification, then she hauled off and slapped the shit out of me."Margareta's hand came up to her throat and she gasped, "Oh my lord! She didn't!" She did. It's like she suddenly regressed ten years to her early teens. No more was said after that. I just went upstairs and packed my stuff. I didn't expect it to end like this, Margareta, but maybe it's for the best, if that's the kind of person that lives inside her."She reached across the table to pat his.
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