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I know I stuttered and stammered, filled with anxiety. The longer we talked, the more I wanted to hear his voice. I felt the soothing sounds calming me. He reminded me of our messages back and forth and, just like those messages, the conversation became more personal. When he called again, I wanted to hear more. It had become a lifeline, filling a void I couldn’t identify, but so comforting. I began looking forward to hearing from him. The days when I didn’t hear from him were anxious ones until the next time. He was a voice to identify now. The calls continued and became more frequent, replacing the e-mailed letters. We talked of family, friends, sadness, joys and needs. It was the needs that bonded us – emotionally and, yes, even the reality of unmet physical needs. We tried to understand more about each other. The time became too short and the conversations became more personal as we poured out our souls to each other. I found myself so needy that I would even share my physical. All of them were wearing masks of one type or another.Ruth was happily contemplating a large gin and tonic while Allison sat rather diffidently, not really comfortable with finding herself part of the group. Although the others were all busily exchanging their ideas of just what they were going to do when they took possession of one or other of the lots on offer, Allison kept quiet, nodding and smiling as the conversation demanded but not really feeling able to join in."This is an excellent idea, Erica dear," Ruth congratulated. "It will do some of your 'students' good to feel another woman's control. I'm sure I speak for most of us when I say you'll find them no worse for our attentions when you get back from your break." I'm sure you'll take great care to see they are well looked after," Erica said, bringing a laugh from most of the others."And do you have that funny little man I had for the County Ball?" Ruth asked. "I might well be interested in bidding for him."Allison looked.
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