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"The nice old Asian who owned the shop and my flat above it was enchanted with my mother. He knew where she'd been and why she'd been there. The same people who'd found the flat for me were obliged to tell him I was an ex-offender and the details of my offence, but all he'd done was to ask me if I intended to steal from him and I answered calmly."No sir, I was convicted of manslaughter, not theft."For a moment or two, he looked at me in silence then held out his hand and shook mine solemnly."I am trusting you, but you steal and I'll be doing the man slaughtering myself."That was good enough for me and ever since then, he'd been kindness itself to me.We filled a basket with cans of lager and a bottle of vodka, mum's favourite tipple, a packet of burgers and some bread rolls too and he said."You take this as a gift for your lovely lady mother."She smiled at him and thanked him, then burst out laughing as he said in a stage whisper, "I'll overcharge him the next time he comes in." He's. Two days before the group is to leave, Frank’s wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn’t going. Frank’s friends are very upset that he can’t go but, what can they do ... Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Frank sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and fish cooking on the fire. “Damn man! How long you been here and how did you talk your wife into letting you go?”“Well, I’ve been here since yesterday. The night before yesterday evening I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind and put her hands over my eyes and said ‘guess who’?” I pulled her hands off and she was wearing a brand new see through nightie. She took my hand and took me to our bedroom. The room had two dozen candles and rose pedals all over. She had handcuffs and ropes on the bed! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed and I did. And then she said “Do whatever you want!” “So here I am.”✧ ✧ ✧Wife and husband have bought condoms with different flavours.“Darling, I.
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