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The usual things that might have kept us busy just felt wrong. I didn’t even swim.On Monday, we were sent back to school. On Tuesday the post-mortem was performed, without any world-ending time paradoxes, and his death was attributed to natural causes. On Wednesday, several national newspapers ran obituaries, which summarised his business activities, and mentioned Caity and me. They even had tributes from a few people that knew him, including one from Sean Connery which made me smile.Then on Friday came the funeral, which was a circus. The public ceremony was held at St Mary’s Church in Wimbledon, where we had attended every Christmas for years. When we got there, we found it absolutely packed, and there was even a TV news crew at the back.There was to be a ‘private committal’ following the service, which I suppose most people thought would be at a cemetery or crematorium. It wasn’t. It was in our back garden. The small brick building by our back fence, which I had always assumed to. "We did! And I have to say that PJ is a pretty awesome dude and Kim...Damn... Kim... Damn." Sam smiled and nodded."Eloquent as always," Emma shook her head. "So, we all know and my datedoesn't need to know so that leaves mom. When do you intend to tellher?"Opie sipped her IPA. "On the way down, I guess."Emma slapped Opie square in the chest. "Oh, like hell you are." Ow!" Opie shouted. "There's still breasts in there you know!" Well maybe you should have them removed and give them to Kimmy," shesaid, tersely. "I'll tell you something, though, young lady," she laidinto Opie, "I have no intention of sitting in a van or a limo orwhatever you're renting for an hour or more while you explain to ourjudgmental mother why you suddenly look like 'Joe Average' and Kimmylooks like 'Miss America.' Do you understand me? You find the time todrag you hairy, manly ass over to her place tomorrow morning and youexplain this situation to her and make sure that YOU are the only onewho's made to feel.
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