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Haynes had only survived, oddly enough, because he had accidentally left his cell phone at the county courthouse and went back to retrieve it. Was it an accident, though, he wondered, or Providence of some kind. Now he had to run the county largely by himself, in a caretaker role, until new commissioners and a new county mayor were elected and sworn into office.This was when Haynes heard a knock at the office door and answered it, as his secretary, Nellie, had already clocked out and gone home. Before him stood a very gorgeous young woman, slender and graceful, hardly familiar at all, as he would have noticed her before. She had the look of an heiress or perhaps a trophy wife or something, and she was not the most intelligent-looking lady in her facial expressions, but that only made her less suspect in terms of any possible malicious intent. She certainly appeared to have money, if nothing else, and that could be helpful in terms of campaign contributions, not to mention a possible. ?Freddy always got drunk at parties, and at around one AM he alwaysstarted to insult the women present. Not because he believed in what hesaid, but because he loved to see their reaction.This time he had tagged along as some party participants decided to moveover to a farm outside of town -- some kind of commune, they told him.People were listening to Kate Bush, discussing politics, religion andthe meaning of life. And at precisely one o'clock Freddy startedblabbering."Women have fat asses," he said this. "Because God wanted them to stayat home, to rest on their behinds, while knitting and cooking." They have fat asses," he said. "Because God wanted us men to havesomething soft and juicy to hold on to when we fuck them." And the finalclinch in his opinion: "God gave them fat asses and broad hips so thatthey could bear kids and have something to carry them on when theyfinally pop out!"This time he had not done his research, as the audience predominantlyconsisted of members of the local.
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