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I think I looked like a human cotton candy.For over an hour we watched the ship move across our horizon seeming tocome closer to shore but in the end it disappeared and our fire went out.I walked back into the cabin realizing this was a paradise for everyonebut me. Crying, I went to my room and lay on the bed face down. All Icould think was I didn't want to be a girl. Why couldn't I just stand upfor myself? Why wouldn't I just let them beat me or kill me instead ofthis? And as I cried I wondered why a man would cry? Why didn't I just getmad? I was crying like a girl.John came by my room and heard me crying he said, "Oh, its ok to be apussy Lauren. Why don't you just take some time for yourself and read somemore of the Rules." He started to close the door and his last words were,"come outside later work on your tan. I think it's starting to fade.I lay there on the bed thinking about John instructing me to go lie in thesun and I decided to tell Sir Bob I wasn't going to be this girl. It also helped take the focus solely off me and my sister and I was grateful for that even if that wasn’t my daughter’s intention.Jessie wore his standard Sears issue button-down and jeans, and Mike wore something pretty casual as well.Chastity and I stood out as total whores the moment we walked in.My mom had married Charlie about five years ago. She had been dating him for years before that. He’s a pervert and a boob watcher, but harmless. He makes no secret about looking at Emily, and I know she knows he likes staring at her. Emily is pretty – it isn’t unusual for old guys to look at her.Randy was there too. He was sitting in my mom’s recliner. Whenever he sees Emily, he usually says something rude to her. “Well, your boobs finally started to sprout. Congrats!” he said this time as she greeted him.“Let me know when your balls drop and you finally hit puberty,” Emily gave him a catty response off the top of her head. She didn’t let her uncle Randy get under her skin. He always said.
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