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What were the results of this erroneous belief? Josh asked.I had a difficult time... no, that's waffling, and Gloria wouldn't let me hedge anything. I couldn't maintain a relationship, Josh, sexual or otherwise. Sexually, I was frigid. I don't think I had more than ten orgasms from the age of twelve when my parents died until I met you, and those orgasms happened during my early teen years from masturbating. I not only suppressed my memories of what my parents did to me, I also suppressed my sexual urges and responses.Do you think you've reconnected with and repaired your past?I've reconnected with my past. Repaired it? No. Some repairs have been made, but I'm not cured, Josh. Still, I think I can join the living now. Will I repair my past? I don't know. Some of it is repairable, other parts - fuck it, I say. Let it lay.I could feel her grin. I was proud of her.What about your lost years? Josh asked.Lost years?Yes, those years when you couldn't maintain personal relationships, even. However, Patty is here and, she’d love to put clothes on your naked body. Or take them off, as you know.” I knew all too well!When I moved into my apartment at the age of 17, I was furiously working on my Masters in physics and making a good living writing instruction manuals for foreign technical equipment. A very good living indeed. I’d get an unintelligible collection of papers in English that was the result of a literal translation of the foreign language. Then I’d hammer it into a format that could be understood by a normal English-speaking consumer. It frequently required telephone conversations with the foreign engineers. Several times I had to travel to the manufacturer’s overseas facility and assemble several engineering and sales people in a conference room so that I could get an idea as to what the damn thing was supposed to do and how to make it do it. I worked fast and my finished “product” was happily received by the customer. I did good work. I got a reputation. My fees.
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